


Pity

by zzaddyy



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, BaekYeol - Freeform, Blood, ChanBaek - Freeform, Crying, Cutting, Death, Depression, EXO - Freeform, M/M, One Shot, One sided, One-Shot, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, baeksoo - Freeform, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-12 09:32:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11734284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zzaddyy/pseuds/zzaddyy
Summary: Park Chanyeol pitied himself.





	Pity

**Author's Note:**

> hope y'all enjoy this.

Park Chanyeol pitied himself.

Park Chanyeol have been happy his entire life, smiling and laughing all the time that gave him the nickname 'Happy Virus'. Of course, because of that no one ever really asked how he was.

Chanyeol always tried to be supportive and not let his emotions show so he could be someone people could depend on.

He remembered the day Mr and Mrs Byun died. Chanyeol wanted so badly to scoop Baekhyun up into his arms and comfort him until he smiled again. But no, Baekhyun went to Kyungsoo instead. I'm not jealous, he tells himself.

Baekhyun, Kyungsoo and Chanyeol have been best friends since they were young, so why does Chanyeol feel this burning feeling in his chest when he saw Baekhyun seeking comfort from Kyungsoo, and Kyungsoo only? 

Chanyeol knew a lot about Baekhyun and when he was nervous, he tended to want to squeeze someone's hand to ease his nerves. Chanyeol knew, because Baekhyun did that to him - when Kyungsoo wasn't there. 

Every single time, Baekhyun went to Chanyeol only when Kyungsoo wasn't there to hold him. And at those times, Chanyeol convinced himself that he was not a second choice, that Baekhyun came to him because they were best friends, not just because Kyungsoo wasn't there.

Of course, that wasn't the case. Chanyeol knew but he just kept quiet when all three of them were together and Baekhyun would hold Kyungsoo's hand, that Baekhyun smiled the brightest when he was with Kyungsoo, that Baekhyun's melodic laugh really came when he was with Kyungsoo. 

He laughed, tears falling out of his eyes, resting on top of his arm and thigh. How could he not have known about Baekhyun's feelings for Kyungsoo? That Chanyeol's love for Baekhyun will always stay one sided? 

Another cut on his bloody wrist. 30.

Chanyeol thought about how Baekhyun went to Kyungsoo and how he was always the second choice. 31.

He thought about how Baekhyun's face lit up when Kyungsoo walked in, when he was just looking tired and bored a minute ago. 32.

He thought about those times he saw Baekhyun and Kyungsoo going out together when they had just told him they were busy. 33.

He thought about how happy Baekhyun looked when he told Chanyeol about his crush on Kyungsoo. 34.

He thought about that time when 'Baeksoo' had just began dating and they had no time for Chanyeol who spent his birthday alone. 35.

Chanyeol stopped at 53 cuts.

He slowly traced the deep cuts on his body, blood spilling out. Chanyeol was losing a lot of blood and he knew that, but he did not acknowledge it nor cared about it.

Park Chanyeol really did pity himself. His only wish now was to leave this cruel world. 

The last thing on his mind was Baekhyun smiling brightly, as Chanyeol slowly drifted into a sleep in which he would never wake up from.

**Author's Note:**

> please comment on what you think about this one shot! i wanna know how to improve my writing since this is the first fanfic i've written. i'm open to criticism!


End file.
